Watch and pray, that you enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak. Matthew 26:41
The city at night is a cesspool of depravity. Men selling their flesh wares, their souls, tempting, tempting
My hands tightened on the steering wheel as I took in the sinners. The way they wear their clothes so tight, each line and ridge of their bodies are on display. BUY ME! BUY ME! My body thrums, need and want and desire burning within me, surging through my veins, heating my flesh, hardening it. Why does their evilness taunt me so? Why must they torture me? I’m a good man, an honest man, a God-fearing man. Why does my body betray me?
I cannot, will not let the devil win the battle for my eternal soul. God will deliver me from temptations if only I stay true. I must be a warrior, a loyal servant to my Lord, for he will ease my troubled mind and my tortured soul.
You have the strength to overcome these temptations.
“How? They are everywhere! Why must I suffer so?”
You are being tested. Be sober, be vigilant, because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walks about, seeking whom he may devour.
My eyes settled on a young lion, and fear and lust filled me in equal measures. He appeared to be a mild, meek man. He was small, but I saw past the disguise. Saw the lion roar within him, the snarling, snapping teeth that sought to devour. God had at least given me the ability to see within others, to recognize the evil. Each time one passed, my heart would beat wildly, breathing became heavy, and my skin would tingle. My hardness was proof of how he tempted others, his wickedness trying to draw me in and make me weak.
I am not weak.
Keeping the lion in my sights, I slip from the car and begin to follow him. My skin crawls as I pass the malevolent creatures with their arms around each other, snake tongues entwining, clawed fingers touching vile skin. Yet my footfalls are sure and measured. I am on a mission. The poisonous stench of sin fills my nostrils, clogs my throat, chokes me, but I push on.
Closer now, my steps fall in rhythm with my prey. My prey! The hunters now being hunted. What irony. What justice. Although he is small, his body sways with the grace of the big cat he hides from the unsuspecting, his movements hypnotic.
I can smell his intoxicating scent. It’s wild, animalistic.
The heat from his body rivals the fire within mine.
My fingers tingle, and a prickling sensation races up my arm at the first contact. My eyes close for only a split second as pleasure overwhelms me. He’s looking at me now, the lights dancing within the dark pools. I want to lose myself in him, my courage, my resolve slipping as lust calls to me, weakens me.
A dance of exchange, a price settled for flesh and agreement.
The smile curling lips, the baring of fangs is telling as I lead him to my car. He knows. Like a bitch in heat, he can smell my need.
He is in my den now, doors locked, mouths smashed together. Teeth, lips, and tongues dueling, fighting, subduing. I am stronger, larger, and purer.
He protests, shoves, fights, but it’s too late. Metal wraps around wrists, locks slide into place, bone hitting bone, will waning, engines roaring. He slumps against the door, his fight gone, but I know it’s only temporary. The lion will roar again. I must have him caged before he wakes.
I stomp on the gas, skillfully maneuvering darkened familiar streets.
I lick my lips, savor his flavor. Everything is purified with blood, and without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness of sins.
Tonight I will be forgiven.
Coming to Dreamspinner Press
October 6th, 2014
Check it out HERE