Yes, for me, gay is too gay. Period.
For a nanosecond, let us set the word “gay” aside because not all male/male oriented guys identify themselves as “gay” and in fact there is demographic evidence to suggest that the term is growing in unpopularity among young men and men my age who see the label as a straightjacket (pun intended).
My thesis is that gay is too limiting a term to the point that it is actually impeding the progress of human rights.
There are men who are attracted to the sheer manliness of other men and do not want a chick with a dick, but they perceive “gay” as chicks with dicks. Bristle over that, but the evidence is there whether anyone agrees with it or not. Ironically, these masculine male/male oriented men are automatically labeled “gay” because the gay community sees “same gender oriented” as somehow offensive.
They need to get the hell beyond themselves and be more tolerant and inclusive.
There is evidence to suggest that the women’s rights movement did two things: (1) made women equal and (2) undefined men and it is only now that men of all sexual persuasions are redefining what it means to be a man. Straight men are emoting more, becoming more fashion and culture conscious, and enjoying their masculinity. Gay men are learning they do not have to be the campy poodles clutching fag hags. Bisexuals are learning it is OK not to choose. Yeah, yeah…chant “I hate Matt Darringer!” all you want and plan to burn me at the stake, but I speak a truth.
“Gay” also brings with it an implied political orientation: Democrat, but there are many same-gendered men who are Republican, not because they are intolerant, Christian-right bigots, but instead prefer Republican political values over Democrats’ values. Many in the gay community are blisteringly intolerant of anyone who is Republican and that is counterintuitive. NEITHER party has done squat for LGBT rights, so instead of being poodles to the Democrats, gays should be infiltrating both parties simultaneously.
There are same-gender oriented guys who see Pride as reinforcing dangerous stereotypes and want no part of it. There are those who see the duct tape NOH8 as dubious at best given that the gay voice is NOT being stifled. There are those who understand that getting gay marriage to be law is being impeded by militant, histrionic people instead of putting all that energy and money into a media campaign about the utter normalcy of same-gender life.
Same-gender people are mothers, fathers, teachers, nurses, doctors, lawyers, fire fighters, police, and so on, but the gay agenda does not allow for that portrayal. Instead the gay political agenda has chosen to purport they are victimized and excluded. While there is some truth there, whining about one’s victimization does not bring strength. It brings stasis and dysfunction.
As a bisexual man, I have been shunned by gay men who accuse me of being afraid to come out of the closet and admit my gayness. Look up Kinsey is all I have to say. Bisexual, not straight or gay, is the norm for human beings and especially for men.
Thus gay is too gay for me. It is time to move away from Lesbian/Gay/Bisexual/Transgender (LGBT) which kicks straight people out of the “in” crowd and move toward Bi/Opposite/Same/Trans Gender (BOST) which puts all people into the club together.